One month anniversary

So on April 17, 2008, was mine and Danny's one month anniversary. I really like him, and he makes me so happy. It all started when I came home from school at 11:30 am. I went into my bedroom where he was sleeping, and jumped on the bed, then I said "Happy one month!" Then he got up and we hung out for a wee-bit, before I had to go to physicaly therapy. Then after words, I came home, took a shower,and tanned outside for about 10 minutes. I then went inside and told him I would be ready to leave in just a few minutes. Little did he know that I wouldn't be ready to leave for another 45 minutes. I picked out a little black top, with a pair of jeans that look just absolutely fabulous on me; I took the time to curl my hair, and do my make-up. All the while he was watching me. He makes me feel all giddy when he watches me as I get ready, for anything. I then made him pick which shoes I was going to wear, and then we left. I felt so pretty, and I like getting all prettied up for him. We then went out to eat at Red Lobster, just so that way I could have my ultimate feast. MMM, he spoils me rotten sometimes. Afterwards we went and saw Mumsie, at her job at Petland. We played with the cutest doggy ever, it was an Akita, and he had such a good temperment; with the fact that Akitas aren't known for. Then we went to our friend Ike's new place and hung out with him, proceeding that we went to our friend JJ's and then Dusty's. We were in by 11pm and attempted to watch The Professional, with his brother Steve and his g/f Jaime. I of course fell asleep within the first 30 minutes of watching it.

I then woke up this morning, and kind of woke him up. :) I had my coffee, and now we are going to go take a shower. Bye Bye!

A very VERY eventful night

So, tonight after I arrived at Gary's studio, me and Tia pretty much stripped down within 5 minutes. We shot on a satin sheet, mmm I love satin it was soft, and so was Tia :) I pretty much showed her some fun techniques also... the rolling of the R's then we played naked twister while Gary took pics. She then presumed to talk for the rest of the night in a russian accent and I couldn't stop laughing. She is so precious with her crazy self. Then we did a lesbian bondage shoot tehe. We were wrapped up in this garland with hearts. It felt like barbed wire and was uncomfy, but it was still fun!!!

lalala

So I hate being sick,I want my uterus to die, and today has been a looonnnnggg day. For instance, I have been sick and ucky feeling, my uterus doesn't want to make up it's mind on if it wants to have a period or not. Then I am here at Mark's with my b/f Petri and our friend Stu. Just chillin and heard a new song of Mark's band. It is awesome mind you. I don't think I will go to school tomorrow cuz I don't feel good tonight and don't think I will feel any better by the morning. Well off to bed here soon so goodnight!

The day out with the G-ma

SSSSoooo.... yesterday was a day to remember

It all started at 6:45 am when I woke up. I made my pot of Kona Koffee as I usually do, then I cleaned my car out. I then woke my brother up at 8 am. Then after I got out of the shower, me and my brother headed out to Indianapolis to spend the day with our g-ma. Well I tried to glue my driver's side mirror and ended up getting super glue all over my fingers!! Then me and Branden met G-ma at the Children's Museum of Indianapolis. Well, there had to have been 3 schools there, so after we paid for our tickets to get in, we started wandering around. Well, between all the little demons running around without chaperones, and the new exhibits they had, it sucked!!!! That museum used to be such a cool place, and it used to be fun! But now it sucks, the exhibits were almost nothing, the people in the place were rude, and the food in their cafe thingy sucked!!! It might as well be closed down.
Well then me and bro, and g-ma, left the museum and met back up at her place. We decided we were going to catch a movie that night. So I am driving and ended up getting lost on the way to her place!! I spent like an extra half hour or hour on the road trying to find my way back. Eventually I found my way back to g-ma's.
We decided we would go see, Drillbit Taylor, and had dinner before hand. MM she made a chicken casserole. mmm, So the movie turned out just fine, it was cute and funny. Then me and the bro had to go back home, because I had to get up and be at a DR's appt this morning at 830 am. Well, on the way home last night, about 40 miles away from the IN and OH border, my car breaks down and is smoking and I started to bawl my eyes outs. After 3 hours of sitting at a gas station waiting for my friends to come pick me and the bro up, I figured out what was wrong with it. And the friends still wanted to drive us home, and tomorrow me and my fam are picking my car up. So I didn't get home until about 3 am, didn't fall asleep until 4 am, got up and went to my dr's appt, and slept and cleaned all day today. THE END

Today...

was a fun, hectic, and just a plain old day. I got up early, while Petri was still sleeping, and cleaned a whole new room, and it isn't even half way done yet ><. Then Petri woke up and we had some fun :D then daddy came home and then I had to leave for a photo shoot right after Petri left for work. At the photo shoot I shot nekid with Lauren :) and Harold and Mike shot us :). It was freezing in the studio! I thought my nipples were going to fall off from how hard they were ><. so now I am home and to bed I am going
goodnight

oi

so yesterday, I cleaned for a good while and I am going to continue cleaning here as soon as I am done with my blog. Then me and Petri took a shower... uber fun... then we watched a movie and layed down and napped. Then we got up and had dinner with the family, then I went to the gym as he went to Mark's, he then picked me up from the gym and we both went to Mark's. I finally got to meet Brittney, she is the one who broke Dusty's heart, and for two years put him in debt and didn't clean while she was home or have a job. She seems nice though. Definately someone who is fun. Then Kenneth Hari pretty much asked me to be his muse and work with him. I am in a debate with that though. He wants me to be exclusive with him starting today! He said I would make a lot of money, but I don't want to be exclusive to him, I want to be able to work with other people, models and photographers. Yet it would be nice to work with him and make lots of money. I just can't help but think of all the people I have already met, and have loved working with. A lot of them have become like a family to me. Orixx is so precious, Gary is such a cool guy. Tony, Mike, Harold, and Jim are like family to me. They always have my back and look into things for me as I would do for them. Adam is really cool, and Anavay, well for a mom she is one hell of a MILF, and so is Orixx. I am so proud of them for keeping a shape and they are so much fun to be around. Char is a hoot too!! She is so out there like me and I love her to death! John and John (fotoguy and jwb) they are so sweet and they love to listen and respond! Amanda F was shy at first but is really sweet. Lady Jewel I have never worked with, but she is out there and I totally give her kudos! Brian Sullivan and Scottie Howison, they are both so gorgeous and great to be around. Kevin and Angela, well they are just a whole new level, and I totally love them!
Bernie is a sweet guy, and really cool to talk to. There are just soo many people that I could go on with, and I don't know how I would feel if I had to just give up working with them. It breaks my heart to think about it, I am torn and don't know what to do :(

last night

I shot with gary for a couple of hours then went over to my friend mark's house as I did his hair waiting for my petri to get off work. Then I came home dad and I watched a thing about a savant (spelling?) and it was really cool. This guy was blind, and at 26 he had a severe autism and had the IQ of a 4 year old. But he was musically genius. He could play any note that he heard, and when they did a study on him to see how his brain worked, they played 64 different parts of Moonlight Sonata, and he randomly guessed on if the pieces were correct or incorrect, but when they looked at the brain waves, he could tell exactly which note was wrong. It was totally amazing!!

Then petri came over and I ended up going to sleep from having a long day of cleaning, cooking, and shooting :(

but he is still here and I am going to seduce him now :)

a new poem :)

I sit inside and wait
Wait for the day you will come
I sit alone and think
Think of all the things I have done
So many stupid
So many smart
So many things I can’t undo
So many things that helped me through

I cry to think of all the hearts I broke
and mine included in the pile
I laugh to think of all the faces
in which I could help make smile
I look back and see the mistakes
In which I have made
And not a single one of them do I regret
For they have made me who I am today

I sometimes feel like I can break
And then I remember
That I must stay strong
Strong for those who are weak
Strong for the innocent who have to deal
With everything that they don’t deserve

I sit inside and wait
Wait for the day you will come
I sit alone and think
Think of all the things I have done
So many stupid
So many smart
So many things I can’t undo
So many things that helped me through

soo...

I got back from my shoot around 7 pm, turns out The Wizard of Oz started at 6 not 8, but luckily I know how to work the tv so that way the family got to watch it. I went over to my friend Herm's house, I got to see Ashley and Jeremy's baby. She is so precious, even when she threw up all over me and it went down my new dress ><. You know though, his family has always considered me family, I was the only daughter they knew for a long time. Now when I go over there I feel like the only people who want or even like me being there is Ashley, Mom, and Dad. Why do I feel like I shouldn't be over there? Why does everyone else over there make me feel like I shouldn't be there. It is almost as if I am a disease that is contagious and deadly. I don't know, maybe I am just being paranoid.

Why also am I so damned confused on everything!!!??? I just got out of a relationship in which because I didn't feel ready for one. Now I want one! God I just need to shoot myself in the foot, maybe then that will clear my head up. I need to go to the gym and just sit in the steam room for a couple of hours. I feel almost left out and I know I shouldn't want to be around him all the time, but I do. He makes me happy... in more ways than one... and so he went out with his friends, who are kind of mine too, but I don't want to go somewhere and just hang out if I wasn't invited to do so. Oh well, it is Easter so therefore, I will just enjoy staying home cleaning all day >< and I also have a shoot with Gary!! Yay!!! And Lauren is going with me and she might get to shoot! Woot!! She is so gorgeous, she looks like Rachael McAdams... well off to bed I am goodnight

up and at 'em

ugh, so I stayed at Petri's last night, didn't get to sleep until about 3 am, and was home by 9. >< I cleaned all night last night before going over. Also a photo shoot today at 1 pm ending around 5 pm. Family night tonight!!! Watching The Wizard of Oz, on TCM at 8pm. Completely digitally remastered, and on our widescreen something or other tv :). Woot. I was the cowardly lion when our school had that play, and not to brag but everyone said I was the best character in the play. That just goes to show I was made to be in front of the camera in one way or another.... but obviously some people don't agree, which is why I was screwed out of my part of the play from this fall, tis why I gave everyone the birdy and walked out. Enough of an angry past. I have to find a way to get my clothes back from the ex, who mind you was doing, and probably still is doing, coke. How does one go about doing that? I called him to see if he would bring them over, that way if he flips out or something I have my mum and my daddy to protect me. My only issues are, 1) I hope he hasn't thrown them away, cut them up, or burned them, 2) I hope he calls me back so I at least know what is going on with them, and 3) if he won't bring them to me I need someone to go with me to get them.
Well I must be off, I have to return a rug doctor, ttyl!!!

petri and ducky

isn't that cute?!?! I had friends who called me ducky, and now I am dating a guy named petri XD it is just too cute! He makes me happy, he supports my modeling fully, and has long hair. MMM and he takes care of it!!! I think I might start taking up boxing, or kickboxing... would you still love me if I was bruised and beaten? I want to be held, who wants to cuddle? I just want a warm blankie and someone to snuggle. Well I must clean, I am tryin to see if I may stay over at Petri's tonight :) wish me luck!!!

My first blog

Woot! Today is the first blog I get to write! Now I am a cool kid... ok maybe not a cool kid, but still I have a blog now. Got back from my MRI. I fell asleep in it, and the guy couldn't even wake me up until the came in and took the headphones off my ears ><. No school tomorrow, thank goodness for spring break. Now I am just waiting to see what happens tonight, on whether or not I may have Petri over, or if I am actually ungrounded and can go out :), off to the gym for a better body. Luvs!!